Six months into dating my first San Francisco boyfriend, I found myself taking it up the ass regularly. I also learned how to use a strap-on with him, AND how to use it well. Like most sex lives, ours needed to be *spiced* up to keep things interesting so I devised a little plan for him...

Jackhammer:(n.) A sexual position similar to Doggystyle, but you lift her legs off the ground while standing which forces her body to be in downward angle. It is named for the resemblance of a construction worker pounding away on a jackhammer.

Helicopter (v.) When a man swings his penis around in a circle and makes the noise of a helicopter. Example: I helicoptered right in front of your mom.

Independent testing shows that it generally takes three to five minutes for the flaccid penis of a young male to become fully erect once sexual stimulation begins. This reaction at least doubles with age. WARNING! Avoid rapid acceleration on slick surfaces. Failing to do so could cause partial or complete loss of control.

Not only were females who were having sex without condoms less depressed, but depressive symptoms and suicide attempts among females who used condoms were proportional to the consistency of condom use.

If you are an insomniac like me, you've probably seen a late-night commercial for the Cami-Secret. Definitely check out the parody below even if you aren't familiar with the original product. Not only does it rip on the "worse fuckin' invention ever" it's a snide commentary on all cheesy late-night commercials.

In fact, the majority of the adult industry works differently than most industries and loves mixing business with pleasure.