Happy New Year! I know we’re four days into it but I’m already so happy to be shaking the dust of 2010 off and welcoming 2011 and all its fabulousness.

And happy first Titty Tuesday of 2011! For your breast pleasure, I present this smart little chart collection of 15 fun facts about breasts! Mariah sent it my way and I had to share. Who doesn’t want to know more about titties!?! I had no idea that they constitute 4-5% of the body’s total fat or that I can go topless in Texas, Hawaii, Ohio, New York and Maine…is this the political issue that will finally bring together the Blue States and the Red States? One can only hope that Obama will bring the right to go topless to all 50 states right after he figures out the financial crisis, brings peace to the Middle East, and get’s North Korean to stop shooting its mouth and missiles off, and gets some marriage equality up in this piece!

15 Things You Should Know About Breasts – Buzzfeed

In other fabulous titty news of the new year, here’s a super sticky pretty titty spread of Maria Ozawa. I guess it’s not really news but it’s new to me and what better way to celebrate the new year than getting the girls all slick and sexy? I could stare at her titties all day…oops…I just did. Le sigh.

Pink Jelly Maria Ozawa- Hegre-art.com

Not sure what you got for Christmas but I was the unhappy recipient of some seriously ugly needlepoint which I now HAVE to dust off and display if my aunt, the creator, ever comes to visit. “Oh gee thanks! Just what I wanted! More old lady crap for my already totally cluttered apartment! No-not at all! I won’t totally annoy the fuck out of all my fellow Christmas travelers when I bang into them with this awkwardly large framed piece of crappy needlepoint. It’s going to make traveling so much more awesome! You’re the BEST Aunt Mildred!” If only she had seen this totally inspired collection of truly fabulous and mostly debauched needlepoint. I would have LOVED the “Cunt” needlepoint. Perfect calling card for my apartment! Now THAT would have been supes popular on the bus home…and would have properly communicated my feelings about holiday travel and sass talk from fellow travelers.

Someone\’s Nana Is A Freak!-Buzzfeed

And with the new year comes new celebrity nudity. Typically it’s tits and ass but today it’s PEEN! Not just any Peen but TI’s PEEN! I’m a HUGE TI fan and my boo has had a horrible year. I dare say TI is just about as excited to close the books on 2010 as I was. He spent the first three months of 2010 in jail, got released and then was picked up again in November for cruising down the Vegas Strip sipping on sizzurp with his baby momma. Can’t say for certain that this picture is actually TI but it looks a HELL of a lot like him. There are some questions I have though…he appears to be in a sauna of some sort…what’s with the sneakers, watch and hat? The watch I can kind of get but the sneakers and wool baseball hat have me seriously confused and concerned. Wool and saunas don’t mix…saunas also don’t help out stinky sneakers…just saying. Anyhoo, I guess that’s for me to contemplate and for TI or fake TI to know.

Rapper TI Junkolicious?

And last but certainly not least, it’s Larissa Riquelme doing what she does best in a video Playboy Brazil just released of her World Cup inspired photoshoot. Last September she did a 3D photo shoot so we can only hope the 3D video will be released shortly…for the five people who bought 3D TV’s this holiday season. I ain’t mad at you…just don’t get you.

Larissa Riquelme Gets Naked in 3D-Who Ate All The Pies
Egotastic!-Larissa Riquelme Nude Pictures